Married couples that truely want to have a happy marriage, why do they end up losing the joy and fellowship God has designed for a marriage? All relationships at times become disfunctional because we forget what it takes to keep a marriage in good working order. The same is true for a car. It must have the proper maintenance at the proper intervals to keep it in excellent condition. This doesn't mean it won't have a problem from time to time but they will be kept to a minimal with the proper maintenance.
Even as Christians we need to be constantly told the same truth over and over because we often forget. This is why the Bible is mostly repetition. We get the same thing over and over in many different colors. Another reason we need to hear the same truths over and over is truths not applied are stolen away by the enemy as described in Mathew chapter 13. When these truths are stolen away by the enemy , satan, the only way to regain the truth and retain it is to hear it preached again or rediscover it in a private devotional and apply the truth in your life.
One reason we lose a grip on a happy mairrage is we communicate with the wrong parties. Satan gets in each partners corner and whispers lies about the other partner so that when they come together, they have already premeditated how they are going to respond to thier mate without actually talking to the partner first. This results in misunderstandings and many quarrels between the married couples. The only way to prevent this is to start out with the truth. Communicate with your partner about what they are thinking and what they might do in a given situation so that you will always be on the same page. The way to resolve conflict that has already manifested is to come back to the truth about what one is feeling and what they might have been thinking. This way you can dispel all of the lies that satan might have told you and gain an understanding of why your partner acted in a certain manner. You'll find that your partner is not the cold and calloused person you thought he of she were but they only had your best intrest at heart.
A regular time of fellowship should be scheduled with your mate so that a good understanding of your mate is always maitained. A word of caution to you is to not try to uncover your mate too quickly. There Should always be some mystery in your mate to keep the relationship intresting. God builds this mystery into a marriage. If you take the most beautiful rose and pull all the petils of it to see what makes it so beautiful , you no longer have a rose. You have destroyed it's beauty.
